Christmas 2015

Christmas 2015

TL;DR - 2015 was the year that Todd & Lenore finally went on that cruise, Jensen came back from Poland, Lane graduated from high school and Ailsa seriously considered running away from Law School and everything to become a mermaid.

Todd & Lenore – Mom continues to stay busy and happy with her calling, and even recently got the opportunity to do something she loves but hasn’t had as part of her regular schedule in a while; she taught in Relief Society! Now that Lenore has heard about Exuma Island in the Bahamas, she wants to go swim with the pigs. Not dolphins! Pigs! I'm not sure Carnival has an excursion for that. Dad’s cycling met with some set-backs this year, but he still completed an impressive 2300+ miles, under the circumstances (about 7-8 weeks off the bike during the height of the season.) At least once, his misadventures prompted a lengthy debate about whether a certain arm was dislocated or if it was merely suffering under an especially nasty-looking hematoma. Even our neighbor nurse friend thought the elbow was seriously messed up (technical term). Ailsa: “Dad, it's not supposed to look like that.” Luckily, it was not dislocated and we all learned something about the importance and convenience of x-rays. He’s still the best sport around, living with four at least arguably traditionally feminine women who have officially subjected him to every period piece ever adapted to the screen by the artful BBC. As life continues to decline into political (and perhaps literal) apocalypse, we all must discover new ways to mentally, emotionally and physically navigate the unrest and constant demands of life. With some help and prompting from friends, both mom and dad have figured out that the best way to deal is to allow time to relax, and specifically to relax on a gigantic boat where you’re surrounded by delicious free food and entertainment and it’s really, really warm.

Lane – After successfully writing an 84 page graduation thesis on the religious history of basically everything since the dinosaurs. Lane received her diploma from Kimber Academy and immediately set about finalizing her plans to become a world renowned surgeon/Bond villain. Then she turned fifteen. She is by far the smartest person in the family, and will never allow that to be questioned. But, why would any of us question it? We’re all counting on her to let us live in her high-tech luxury volcano-powered secret lair one day. She’s also developed the absolutely charming habit of constantly singing full voice (especially in confined spaces like automobiles) to music that only she can hear through her earphones. And only she cares about. Specifically Twenty-One Pilots.

Jensen – Completed her full-time mission and learned to speak Polish with excellent proficiency, or so she tells all of us non-Polish speakers and we must only assume she is stating the truth. But, to the untrained (or trained) ear, it sounds like Lenore's childhood made up language: “Jiffy Dog Joe”. Jensen hadn’t been back five minutes and she started making plans to return to Poland next Spring. From her stories, we can’t really blame her. It sounds like she really found her geographical match and made a big impact on the mission, as well as allowed it to change her, and consequently, all of us, for the better. None of us even tries to pretend like Jensen isn’t the favorite in the family. She and the video game Fallout 4 met within weeks of her home-coming and we expect a happy announcement any day now. Jensen is currently performing seasonal work with the Post Office and treating all of your Holiday packages with the care they deserve.

Ailsa – Is still at BYU law school and DOESN’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!. But she also went on a cruise, and honestly is enjoying her life genuinely, it’s not really that bad, she’s just a bit sleepy at the moment. Her greatest achievement is reaching the remarkable plateau of having 3 followers on her Instagram account.

We’re all looking forward to 2016, and to the great experiences we know are ahead. As another year closes out we can’t help but feel immensely blessed by God, and by our association with all of you, our sweet friends and family. May Heavenly Father bless and protect you, and may you all have a Merry Christmas!

The Lillywhites

Jensen's Homecoming

The McClearys

Where Lane is From

I am from painted fruit along the kitchen walls,
from ice cold tiles and brittle clay.
I am from shaded blankets and clawing grass
(familiar creatures creep around me, pouncing at birds.)
I am from the sloping hill, from the swing above the grave,
a spider creeps up the rope, hiding in the bark
from rusty swing sets and bird nests,
from sitting still and being quiet.

I am from scabby knees and bruised knuckles,
from chocolate and nuts.
I'm from hot summers and cold winds tearing at our aspen trees,
from milky eyes and ivory keys.
I'm from spaghetti sauce and basil plants,
from hands gripping me tight,
from blood mixing with asphalt.

I'm from white death masks and cotton filled bullet holes,
from dusty letters and skin crawling in the basement,
from toes on thorns and leaves tangled in unkempt hair,
from a child's fingers tracing over detailed sketches,
from lit candles and tissue boxes,
from the stench of hydrogen peroxide.

I am from those moments not yet lost to the rigors of life,
sun kissed bliss painting what I can never obtain.

Lane Lillywhite
inspired by George Ella Lyon's “Where I'm From”

Screen Shots from Old Family Camp Video

San Clemente 2015

We've been milking the Explorer for all that we can. Last year we just wanted to be able to drive it one more time to San Clemente. Well, we made it again this year. But, just barely. We passed 200,000 miles in the area of Meadow, Utah on the way down to California. Right in the area of Norco the AC went out. We toyed with getting it fixed in San Clemente. But, didn't like the quote. So we drove it back home without AC. Well hey, it's been done before. We just used a lot of ice and a spray water bottle to keep ourselves coolish, and ample doses of WD-40 on the compressor. I guess we kinda took a chance because within the week after arriving back home the compressor seized and the serpentine belt broke. We put another $1000 into the car and now we have to drive it for another year or so. We won't be trying to take it down to San Clemente though.

With my shoulder still quite weak and sore from my recent bike accident, I tried to go surfing. But, it was too strenuous. I also tried some SUP. But, the only board at the shop I went to was 9 feet. Plenty of buoyancy. But, not nearly as stable as I need evidently. Fielding tried as well. I kept trying. But, each time I had to climb back on the board my shoulder was that much more sore.

The water in San Clemente this year was very consistently warm. It is better to go later in August or even into September for water temperature. The tides were also predominately lowish, which is nice for a couple of reasons. It gives more room on the beach.

Poppa did pretty well. But, probably won't be going anymore.

In keeping with the tradition of foreign cats, there was a fat black and white cat next door to Mr. Lui's apartment. He was wary of us though. I tried to coax him in. But, he retreated.

I did some bodysurfing and had some good fun. But, as I age I can tell that I have to be ever more cautious of getting myself into trouble. I don't have the strength, stamina, or breath that I used to. Oh, to be young again.

Cassano's pizza is now Beachfire pizza and they have changed their sauce. We think they put balsamic vinegar in it. Not really to my liking. They are probably trying to distinguish themselves from the Crab Pot's pizza.

We enjoyed Church meetings at the Forster Ranch ward. Very nice people and they did very well on their services and their lessons. Saw Karen Campbell and family. Others I know were out of town.

Ward Campout and Taylor's Cabin

Caribe Cruise

Lenore and I wanted a 25 year anniversary trip back in 2011, something similar to our Hawaii and Mexico trips. We finally had some money and a little extra time off. So, we did it this year. Michelle and Steve Young suggested we take a cruise together. We liked the idea and it really went relatively smoothly and painlessly.  We took a 6.75 day cruise in the Eastern Caribbean on Carnival Glory. I think I am safe in saying that this vacation topped Hawaii and Mexico.

Michelle did the research and the contact with the travel agency. All together we spent just a little over $3100. But, we ate a lot of that back in food.

My first impression on board the ship was, "even fat boorish people go on cruises." More on that later. The comparison between the help/staff and the passengers is stark and amazing.

We had four stops: Half Moon Cay in the Bahamas; St. Thomas U.S. Virgin Islands; San Juan Puerto Rico; and Gran Turk British West Indies.

Our two favorite places were Half Moon Cay and Grand Turk. But, the other places were nice too. The water in Half Moon Cay was crystal clear and about 80 degrees. The sand was amazing. I saw numerous fish just sticking my head under the water. Most of them were clear or very light colored so they blended in well. I may have seen a two foot or so barracuda right near the shore. It was a long slender fish. I tried to corral him in the shallow water. But, there was plenty of room for him to get away.

In St. Thomas we just went to Sapphire Beach and hung out. I had wanted to do some SUP or surfing. Looking back, I should have at our first two stops. The only place there was ANY surf to speak of was at Sapphire beach. They do surf in Puerto Rico. But, we spent the day walking the old city and seeing the neat old Forts.

Grand Turk was quite the adventure because we did the Ultimate Snorkeling shore excursion. The guides were fun. Of course, they are paid to be charming. But, all of the guides and help and staff seemed to be sincerely helpful and solicitous. The first dive spot was about 25-30 feet deep and then drops off abruptly on a sheer 6000 foot drop. It was very impressive. I had to re-learn surface diving and breath management. I eventually worked up to where I could go down 30 feet and even stay a little while. The most important thing is equalizing the pressure in your ears, early and often. There was no way to go down even 10 feet otherwise. At the other dive spot we saw a ray and urchins and lots of fish and I finally found a shell to bring home for a souvenir.


Now back to my impression about the passengers. There were many I am sure who ate five 1500 calorie meals a day and then also drank at least $100 in liquor. I was probably the most conservative of all the passengers when it came to consuming food. And I overdid it a lot.


The help were very cordial (many from Philippines and India and other somewhat impoverished places) and sincere and I felt sorry for them having to work long hours. I hope/think they get paid well. But, they have to leave their families for months at a time. On the other hand the passengers seemed oblivious to all around them. Many were rude and loud and selfish and not conscientious about obstructing traffic areas and their overall impact on the experience for others.


With the Youngs we saw the shows that the a group of eight singers and dancers put on almost every night. They were overall entertaining and enjoyable. However, probably didn't need to go to half of them. Very talented and energetic performances though.


We may have to go back to Half Moon Cay and Grand Turk. Doesn't have to be by boat though.

Marathon Bike Tour 2015

Macroglossum Stellatarum

We went to Saint George for this latest Conference Holiday Weekend. I've been wanting to go visit my parents. But, with mom's operation in December and my Saturday shift at the Temple it's been difficult. We decided to take advantage of the Temple being closed on 4 April. Laney was also not scheduled to work on 3 April. She was a little grumpy about losing a full day off lalapoloozing around the house rather than driving in the car. But, she got over it.

Once again the drive was very convenient. It's nice that Utah has raised the speed limit to 80mph for most of the way. It's quick, fairly comfortable, and we got 28mpg for the outgoing leg while using the climate control and going as fast as I dared.

When we arrived at the house, I noticed what I thought were very small hummingbirds feeding on some flowers in the front yard. They were about 2/3rds size of what you would expect. It was very hard to get a good look at them though. Finally, I was able to look at one on axis rather than from the side and it was not a humming bird, but a hummingbird moth. Very interesting creatures. The biggest visual differences once you can get a clear view of one is they have no tail feathers and they have antennae.

We woke up early in the morning on Saturday to get a look at the lunar eclipse, the third of the current tetrad. The sky was very clear. Venus was very bright in the early night sky.

I took a bike ride in the morning on the river trail. I like to get out early and enjoy the sunrise. But, it was too cold for that. Left about 8am. I had a minor accident (pun intended). I ran into a kid about 14 years old when he slowed and then made a u-turn right as I was passing. I was able to almost completely stop before hitting the side of his bike. Neither of us was hurt and neither bike had any damage. My chain did drop. All I could muster as I was trying to stop was “Dude!” He apologized profusely. But, I was angry enough I figured I'd better not say anything else for fear I would say something mean or petty. So, I am sorry I didn't ease his shame by explicitely accepting his apology.

The trail was pretty well travelled that morning. I also almost ran into another couple who had stopped to chat on the trail right behind a blind curve. There were a couple of hot-air balloons in the sky down east of River road. One came very low (about 10 feet off the ground) while only about 30 feet off the trail as I rode by.

Dad and I did some shopping at Costco and saw the Coxes there. I think I've run into them before in Saint George. They own a condo there.

Conference was very nice. Several very good talks and others I will have to hear again. One quibble with the choir. Lately the style is to sing very soft and light. They have 300 voice choirs and never sing over “mezzo” volume. It's a little like having a 1200 horsepower Bugatti Veyron that you drive around at 30 miles an hour max, never leaving the parking lot. On occasion, I would like to hear and anthem or two sung with lots of volume and gusto. Ailsa likened the songs to lullabies. Let them sing for goodness sake.

On the topic of the “opposeurs”: We need some instruction in the Church. Sustaining or opposing are not opposites in our context. You sustain someone in their calling. Or, if you know of some reason they are not worthy or possibly otherwise not suitable for their calling, you raise that concern. I see what happened at Conference as a little bit of grandstanding.

The opposers are upset about Kate Kelly and John Dehlin. I expect one of their claims is that the top Church leadership orchestrates or is otherwise more directly involved in these disciplinary councils of high profile cases. The councils are held on a Ward or Stake level, no higher. They appealed their excommunications to the First Presidency. But, if they grant the appeal, they give a vote of no confidence to the Bishop or Stake President who held the council, and thereby confirm their direct influence on the process. The person whose calling they should be opposing is the leader of the council. It's a jurisdictional problem.

Verbal Dyslexia

This is a Laney story. I think I've written before about her “verbal dyslexia” when she was learning to speak. There were several words that she turned inside out. This may be her Semitic heritage coming through. For example, “cursomel” was commercial; keekoo was cookie. You get the idea.

Once she was out in the back yard playing and she came to the back door saying there was a “kinchen” in the yard. Kinchen was how she said chicken. Well, I was pretty sure there wasn't a kinchen in the back yard. But she insisted and got fairly annoyed at us. Finally, Lenore went outside and had Laney show her.

Sure enough, it wasn't a kinchen. But, there was a deceased baby quail that looked a lot like a baby chick. It took awhile for Laney to forgive our mistrust in her. “See, there was a kinchen in the yard!”

Missing Her

Back in October we had two missionaries leave from our Ward, Dallas Anderson and Brooklyn Brewer. We attended a very nice open house at the Andersons to congratulate Dallas and express our best wishes for his service. Dallas' father is a good friend (also served in the Milan Mission.) Since we had gone through the same thing only six months prior with Jensen leaving, he asked me, “So, how long before it doesn't suck anymore?” How long before the hole left behind by a child leaving isn't the only thing you can think about? I told him about eighteen months, or in Dallas' case two years, the duration of their mission. That hole is always there and is only repaired when they come back having served well.

My Brother from Berkshire

We went to the wrong Eddie Redmayne movie this weekend. I think Jupiter Ascending was built from three pages of script notes and filled in with action sequences. This must be a new kind of Hollywood gamble: throw $175 millions in production money at an idea and hope the audience comes. In this case they built it, but...

I could go on in detail about its failings. This review sums it up pretty well:

“Jupiter Ascending” took the road less traveled, into the wish-fulfillment of prepubescent girls. Around half an hour into the film, Channing Tatum despondently regales Mila Kunis with his life story — he is the orphaned half-albino runt of a space werewolf litter forced to use anti-gravity rollerblades to fly because his bionic wings were stripped when he was dishonorably discharged from the space military — and something magical happens. Every woman who ever wrote herself into her favorite universe via fanfic, every girl who created an amnesiac elven vampire princess and role-played in a chat room, every chick who ever wanted a blaster by her side and a submissive werewolf boyfriend at her back, every one of them whispered, “Finally. It is our time.” Read more at http://www.hitfix.com/harpy/jupiter-ascending-is-the-sci-fi-movie-women-were-waiting-for#X7mWjPlmTt0vZtlQ.99

As we were leaving we overheard one of the audience members responding to a theater employee who had asked what he thought about the film. He said it was the best science fiction movie ever. We weren't even in the same Galaxy let alone movie house. The only thing to recommend in this production are the costumes and the visual richness.

Mr. Redmayne the academy is on the phone. They would like their statue back.

P.S. The ONLY reason to hope for a sequel is so that Sean Bean can be killed off to keep his streak going.